Day 6 of Being Thankful- My children

My children are probably what I'm most thankful for. In the fourteen years since my first baby was born, my heart has been opened and filled with an all consuming love, I never knew possible, Summer Bunny, DJ, Syd and Spike make me laugh, cry, smile, even yell a little ( maybe a lot). I'm thankful for this messy, crazy loud and joy filled life they've given me.

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Super Mom Guilt

In the internal (and sometimes external battle) of Stay at Home versus Work Outside the Home moms. I was pretty sure I had won the war when I became a Work at Home mom. I figured that a flexible schedule and a low minimum of time requirements would allow me to contribute financially to the household, take care of my family and leave some time to pursue my writing. I win right? Umm Nope. I wonder if everyone isn't losing. When I'm working, I feel like I should be playing with the kids (actually they are standing there telling be I should be playing with them). So I never put in the time I promise myself I'm going to put in. When I am spending time with the kids, my mind constantly wanders to that pile of dirty laundry that's been giving me the evil eye for two days or the scene I promised my writing partner I'd have finished tonight. And if I buckle down to write that scene, I'm haunted by the money I'm not making chasing a dream instead of putti...

Letting Go of Happily Ever After and Embracing Happy Now

Like most young girls, I was enthralled with romantic fairy tales. Who wouldn't want to have Prince Charming to show up with that glass slipper that would undoubtedly fit just right? Or maybe have him ride up on his noble steed and wake you from some mysterious illness with true love's kiss? These ideas of romantic bliss are drilled into little girl's heads from very early on. There's nothing wrong with fairy tales, they are entertaining and fun and they make great Disney movies. While I outgrew my princess obsession, I didn't quite give up on Prince Charming. Why would I? Every movie I loved assured me he existed. Of course as I grew up, my ideal prince changed too. So while I didn't expect him to show up at my door with a glass slipper, or rescue me from some isolated tower. I was pretty sure my high school crush would serenade me with his boombox outside my window like in "Say Anything", or maybe I'd ride off on the back ...

Before Autism.....

Before Autism touched my life, I considered myself the kind of mother who pretty much had it together. Before Autism, I worked a full-time executive position, where my obsessive and control freak tendencies served me well. My three children were used to the daily routine of full-time school or daycare. Weaning, potty-training, bedtime issues, discipline, those were things OTHER mothers struggled with, for me it never seemed like a huge deal. I managed to sail through the first 9 years of motherhood without wrinkling my designer clothes, mussing my perfectly relaxed hair, or chipping a french manicured nail. I could never understand what other parents complained about. I was so smug and arrogant. I could not imagine what must go on in the houses of the lady behind me in the check out line with the screaming, rebelling children. I would think to my myself "home girl needs to get it together". I thought I was done having kids, so my fourth pregnancy was a huge surprise i...

I Just Want to Be Superwoman

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